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21 September 2006
tags: ,

i’ve decided that since i use google to find everything else, i should also use it to discover what exactly i need. because i clearly haven’t been able to figure it out on my own and google is like the 21st century version of a seer. so, with thanks to marigold who inspired this and my last post, google tells me that i need the following:

  • amelia needs you!
  • amelia needs to turn her attention to regaining her husband’s love
  • amelia needs 3-4 hours of exercise daily
  • amelia needs a haircut and a real job
  • amelia needs to rise to the challenge
  • amelia needs help
  • amelia needs to pray for getting her horrible grades up
  • amelia needs him
  • amelia needs constant support and encouragement and this can be achieved with outside help and financial aid in the form of regular donations or a monthly debit order
  • amelia needs attention to details
  • amelia needs to get to the library
  • amelia needs a desk that meets her work needs
  • amelia is really a princess, and in order to break the spell she is under, she needs a kiss before two cycles of the moon pass
  • amelia needs someone who is understanding, intelligent and likes planning ahead like she does
  • amelia needs to learn impulse control
  • amelia needs a good nap


  • amelia doesn’t need “big assets”

i also discovered another amelia in the blogosphere who has done this precise search. i didn’t steal all of her amelia needs; i only used the ones that my own google search turned up.

now i think i should feel slightly disturbed. the entries in color are so accurate that i couldn’t have stated them better myself. i made one gray because it’s essentially accurate–i could certainly use a kiss within the next two moon cycles–but the princess and spell parts can only be interpreted metaphorically.

and you? do you have needs?

6 Comments leave one →
  1. 21 September 2006 11:46 pm

    how can you be sure you’re not under some sort of a spell? is there a way to know? this is a serious question because i’m certain i’ve been bewitched.

  2. 21 September 2006 11:50 pm

    Most of my momentary needs for mirth and amusement have been met by this fine post. :)

  3. 22 September 2006 8:20 am

    i suppose i can’t be positive i haven’t been bewitched; it would certainly be a handy explanation for things on occasion. hmm…i wonder if i’ve accidentally crossed a witch.good to see you w. and glad you enjoyed. :)

  4. 8 May 2007 6:05 pm

    So you found a whole lot more than I have… :o) I didn’t know we were all so needy.I actually DO need bigger assets though. :o(Amelia

  5. 5 February 2009 4:38 pm

    The one in light blue would fulfill my needs rather well… although I wouldn’t say no to a good nap, either. (from another Amelia, who performed the same search)

  6. 15 January 2010 2:15 am

    I am an Amelia who did the same search :) my fav was 'Amelia needs no beauty shop guy'

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